Adults With ADHD - Do You Need an Attitude Adjustment?

I hate to say it, but a lot of adults with AD/HD have an attitude problem. Many of us are negative thinkers with low self-esteem.

It's understandable; life with AD/HD can have us feeling bad for being so "different" from everyone else. And we feel worse when we try to improve our lives using the wrong systems.

Mainstream advice doesn't account for the unique wiring of AD/HD brains, and when this advice fails, we feel like we've failed. It chips away at our self-esteem.

As a result, many people with AD/HD grow up to be BMWs-people who constantly B*tch, Moan, and Whine! This is one of the reasons that adults with AD/HD often have trouble making new friends and maintaining relationships. It's also why so many of us struggle to get along with our family members, coworkers, and neighbors.

No one likes to hang out with a BMW. Their constant brooding, complaining, and finding fault can quickly bring a happy person down or zap that person's energy. Simply put, BMWs are a drag!

If you are a BMW, then don't fret. With a little work, you can adjust your attitude and improve your social skills. Here are three practical things you can do right away to overcome being a BMW.

1. Accept compliments with grace and gratitude-even if you don't agree with them.

If you're a BMW, then chances are that your self-esteem can use a pick-me-up. Accepting the compliments that are paid to you will go a long way in helping you feel better about yourself.

You'll find that most people genuinely mean what they say. If your friend says she likes your haircut, believe it! If you argue with her compliment by disagreeing and saying something like "This is the worst haircut I've ever had!", then you're essentially telling your friend that her opinion is wrong.

2. Avoid putting yourself down in front of others.

People often view self-deprecation as "fishing for compliments" and feel a responsibility to lift you up and make you feel better. After a while, this becomes annoying, and you can easily lose friends who might view you as high maintenance.

There's a big difference between expressing your challenges, and putting yourself down for them. It's perfectly okay to say "I would have liked to have the house cleaned up by the time you got here, but unfortunately I didn't have enough time." In contrast, a BMW might say something like "I'm such a slob! My house is always a mess and no matter what I do I can never get it together!"

3. Surround yourself with positive, happy people.

One of the easiest ways to adjust your attitude is to surround yourself with people worth emulating. When you choose to spend time with other BMWs, you're choosing to be a BMW.

Make a concerted effort to ditch the BMW within, and then invite a pleasant coworker to join you for coffee, take a walk with a friendly neighbor, or reconnect with a supportive friend. You'll absorb the positive energy of these good influences. And positive, happy people will be much more understanding when you do find yourself running late for lunch or forgetting a birthday!

When you adjust your attitude by increasing your self-esteem and adopting a more positive perspective, you'll find that you have an easier time creating and maintaining social connections. People will enjoy spending time with the real you, and you'll feel better about yourself, too!

Computer Literacy

Once, the thought was that only businesses had a need to use computers. Therefore, computer literacy was not necessary or required of the layperson. The average person only needed to learn and do what their corporate or organizational bosses told them.

Outside of work, a desktop (personal) computer was simply the next new electronic gadget for the home. A personal computer was for convenience and fun, and not a necessary requirement of everyday living.

Now days, if you lack computer knowledge and skills you may start to suffer low self-esteem, especially when you see the young and the elderly possessing such skill and knowledge.

You now find the use of computer technology in almost everything you do - all day, everyday. In fact, some high-end automates seem to require more than a little understanding of computer technology in order to understand the operational and programming functions.

Banks and other financial institutions may soon require some activities to take place on-line (for example, receiving e-bank statements), or you will pay a fee for an alternate method such as postal mail.

The younger you are the more difficulties you will experience in the future, if you do not possess a working (and constantly increasing) knowledge of computers. Improve your computer literacy and your self-esteem will certainly improve.

Those in the fifty plus generation, due to longer life expectancy, may also have trouble if they do not become computer literate.

In addition to self-esteem and lifestyle reasons, there are two other reasons why you should become computer literate.

Mental Health :

Studying computers will stimulate and challenge your mind. Learning all about computers will force your mind into a higher level of mental activity. In so doing, you strengthen brain cells and nerve connections. As a result, you maintain a higher level of mental alertness long into your later years. Vigorously exercising your mind, regardless of age, is necessary for long-term mental health, and for living a more vivid and fulfilling life.

Increase your computer literacy. Create a desire to learn all you can about computers. You could start by taking a class at a senior plus center or the continuing education division of a local college or university, or simply self teach. It is never too late to start.

Money :

a) The more you know about computers the more valuable you become to your employer. Your increased value could lead to job security and sometimes promotional opportunities.

b) Earn extra income by helping others with their computer problems. More and more people are buying computers. A fast growing trend is the need for inexpensive home visits to assist people (an aging population) with understanding computers, solving a wide range of computer problems, setting up a home computer network, and internet security.

Now you have it! Whatever you become computer literate for reasons of lifestyle, mental health, to make money, to improve your self-esteem, or any other reason, you absolutely benefit. You can not lose.